>4th December, 2008
3.oo am.<
I looked out my window, the car was parked in the driveway.
I'm not entirely sure why I was up at that hour.
I walked out into the kitchen, Chris was on the laptop.
Walked into the hall, peeked into dads room.
He wasn't there.
Hmmm?
“Chris where's dad?”
“Sitting outside.”
“Huh? Why?”
“Uncle Kasim died.”
“What????? How?”
“He was shot.”
“By who???”
*shrugs shoulders...”*
Silently debating if I should go out to see how dad is, I walked back to my bedroom. I peeked out my window again and wondered how I hadn't seen my dad sitting there earlier. I decided against going out, I would've wanted to be left alone.
Uncle Kasim, I've known him longer that I've know my sister. That's more than 12 years. He used to be around a lot when I was a kid. But, after he settled down in Thailand some years ago, I only remember seeing him twice. We will never know what really happened that day. From what dad tells us,...
He was having drinks with some friends, there were a couple of guys at another table. When he finished he left. He went back home, and when he reached home he got a call. Someone asked him to meet up at the restaurant. He went back. No one is quite sure who or what it was about. When he about to leave, he saw these two men again and he asked them what they were still doing there because it was late and the place was about to close. They said they were waiting for a mechanic because their motorcycle had broken down. He offered them a ride and told them to leave their motorcycle there until the next morning. When they got to the car he reached to open the door. That was when one of them pulled a gun out, and shot him. Twice.
*flashback*
>car, parents and siblings in the back, Uncle Kasim's girlfriend in driver's seat, he's in the passenger seat, I'm on his lap.<
“Honey...”
*giggles*
“Kathleen, why are you laughing?”
“Well you called her honey, that's what bees eat!”
*chuckles*strokes hair*
“Kathleen, honey is not what bees eat, it's what they make.”
“Owh...” :D
>I was 4<
>31st August, 2008, The Backyard Pub, Desa Sri Hartamas, just after midnight<
“Kathleen, you were the one who cooked that day? Can you cook vindaloo?
“Not yet” xD
“Well do you know that I have a recipe for vindaloo in my wallet.”
“Haha, ok....”
“The next time I come down we'll make vindaloo.”
“Well, its a deal then.
>some minutes later, I've forgotten how the conversation steered in this direction<
“well, I can tell you something, I've known you since you were this high”
*motions with hand*
“And I can say that you've done a fine job growing up. You've grown into a fine young lady.
“Thank you.”
“I wouldn't worry about you.”
“Well, you should try telling dad that.” xD
>I've told people this story but I always stop after the promise to make vindaloo.<
Mum told us how one time Uncle Kasim came over with his kids, and his eldest son Vicharnt fell down and they had to borrow our ice pack and also how he promised to return the ice pack. She's still waiting for it.
Just like how I'm still waiting to make vindaloo.
Nan, has had a couple of dreams since the tragedy.
In one, she is seated between rows of chairs and hears a shot.
She turns around to see what it was when she heard someone say,
“Shoot him again, one won't kill him. Let him go peacefully.”
>3rd December, 2008, de Cruz residence<
>My grandpa's death anniversary, Uncle kasim's 3oth day.<
We went for mass.
That night my dad had some of Uncle Kasim's close friends and kids over for dinner.
It was also the day Chris told me about Nan's other dream.
I'm not sure if I've got it right but this was how it went.
It's dark, two men are holding Uncle Kasim back.
Someone (i'm not sure who) is telling him to let go.
His reply was, “How do you want me to go when they're not letting me go.”
That's when the scene outside my house, flashed across my mind.
Uncle James, Uncle George, Uncle Dino, Aunty Carol, Eli, Aunty Helen, Vicharnt, Virapol, Nan, daddy, mummy and some others whose names I don't know. All of them seated outside, sharing stories about Uncle Kasim, and then there's that reminiscent silence that follows.
“How do you want me to go when they're not letting me go.”
Today I watched One Tree Hill.
Peyton said this to Lucas.
“In some weird twisted way, today I learnt that the greatest sacrifice is letting go. I love you, and I want you to be happy. I want that with all my heart. I love you, but if what you want from me is to let go, then that's what I'll do. It's only because I love you.”
It's time we let go.
Be happy Uncle Kasim, we love you.
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